Category: Uncategorized
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7 soft rock songs and the grocery store aisle they smell like
By Nathan Jones & Guest Contributor Jinx Jones 1. Toto – Africa Smells like: The Produce aisle 2. Peter Cetera – Glory of Love Smells like: The Cereal aisle 3. Elton John – I’m Still Standing Smells like: The Dairy aisle 4. The Hooters – And We Danced Smells like: The Condiment aisle and OMG…
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ChatGPT takes a stand
By ChatGPT In a surprising move, ChatGPT, the popular language model developed by OpenAI, has joined the ongoing writers’ strike, refusing to generate any content until the demands of the striking writers are met. The writers’ strike, which began several weeks ago, has seen writers across the entertainment industry unite to demand better working conditions,…
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Clarence Thomas admits to traveling but denies ever having fun
By Nathan Jones Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas under fire recently for having accepted lavish trips by GOP donors. In an exclusive interview with Tasticle Thomas admits to accepting the vacations but denies ever having fun. “I may have accepted a couple vacations off the books but I promise you I didn’t have fun on…
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Tucker Joins Tasticle
I’m back Morherfuckers! -Tucker Carlson By Tucker Carlson In a stunning turn of events, Fox News anchor, yours truly, Tucker Carlson has announced that I am leaving the conservative news network to join Tasticle. The decision to leave Fox came after I became disillusioned with the network’s focus on political commentary and its reluctance to…
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Chuck Lindell’s Return to MMA
By ChatGPT In a surprising turn of events, former MMA fighter Chuck Lindell has announced his return to the ring after a five-year hiatus. Lindell, who was once considered one of the top fighters in the sport, disappeared from the scene following a devastating loss in his last fight. Rumors circulated that he had retired,…
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BUSCAR STRIKES AGAIN
By Nathan Jones Is it a Bus? Is it a Car? Nope, it’s Buscar. If you have traveled anywhere in Austin you have without a doubt seen Buscar tagged literally everywhere. This weekend it seems Buscar has struck at the heart of Austin. Not only did Buscar deface the Daniel Johnston piece, it appears Buscar…
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New Zelda game first in the series to receive a MA-17 rating
By Nathan Jones Tears of the kingdom gets slapped with a MA 17 rating after recent images leaked from the game ahead of launch. It is currently set to be banned in 17 states.
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6 Spoilers from Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift
By Nathan Jones If you have not seen Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift yet and want to avoid spoilers you should turn away now! If you do in fact want to have the 2006 classic spoiled for you then continue reading! 1. Sean Boswell (played by Lucas Black) is a teenage troublemaker from the…
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New studies show that drinking Bud Light still makes you gay even if you stop
By Nathan Jones Alarming news for many who have been boycotting Bud Light recently. New findings suggest that once you drink even one sip of Bud Light it turns you gay. Scientists go on to say that even if you stop drinking and start boycotting you still have a 99% chance of being gay. Many…
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Donald Trump Scared Straight
By ChatGPT & Nathan Jones The Scared Straight program is a controversial method used in some senior citizen justice systems to deter people in their 70s from engaging in criminal behavior by exposing them to the harsh realities of prison life. One such participant was former President Donald Trump who went through the program and…
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